So one of my fave movies right now is Marie-Antoinette – I have been listening to the Sound Track Non-Stop!  J’adore the “I Love Candy” sequence, because every now and then, i just want clothes, shoes, Jewlery and tons of fatty little cakes and champagne…  without those days we will shrivel up and die… or at least i do…

My work is insane… i have been in the office till 9 or 10pm most nights, when i am not, i am working from home till 2am… Tonight I had to go home sick from stress and fatigue at about 5:30pm (usually that is about 1/2 way through my day) I got home and slept till about 7pm – when I woke up, Moulin Rouge was on tv and i had just been dreaming about Amelie…
I put on my MA soundtrack.. pushed away the lap top and threw all my pillows on the floor, served myself flowering japanese tea on a glass tray with chocolate covered candided orange peels and then followed it up with a small bottle of Sofia Champagne and fresh mango slices with crystal sugar sprinkled all over them…
Just now I lined up my shoes in a row and organized my jewlery… discovered that i have way too much of it…  i gave Pearl (my kitten) some whip cream, she needed a break too…
then i watched The Riches (my new fave tv show- Eddie Izzard, wow… quite a change)… anyway, somedays you need a fix.. whatever your fix is.. treat yourself to it before you are sent home sick.. keep yourself happy…  no one else will do that for you…
I started a new screenplay tonight… i think my creativity is most comfortable in the throws of indulgence…  those candied orange peels were amazingbr>
One thing i know is that even Marie sought out peace and traquility away from the stress and pomp of Versaille.. when i visited Versaille, i was most impressed with her little cottage sanctuary and her music room… as a woman in a world where it really sucks to be a woman.. sometimes finding fulfillment is a moment to moment process… i have alot of friends who seem to think that getting a man is the main goal of life… from what i have seen, it seems like you shouldnt get a man unless you are ready to add even more stress to your life… not that men are all bad, they have their place in life too.. but i think unless you are totally happy and fulfilled and joyous in yourself and your own life, a man is just a complication one can do without… that being said.. a cutey patootee now and then is always a nice addition to cakes and shoes and champagne… and the daily work out (which oddly, i find i enjoy too – i DO mean exercise..)

Think of ways to pamper your brain, your soul, your body, your spirit… and be well.

Currently listening:
Marie Antoinette
By Original Soundtrack
Release date: 10 October, 2006

I am always talking…  and doing, but talking first…

I talk a lot about what I want to do, what i will do, what i am working on.. about ideas that spring up and opportunities that may be captured…

I am not frivolous in my choices… but i have realized that the ferver with which i put ideas and considerations out there makes some people wonder if I have clear focus and direction at all… rest assured that I do… there are simply many means to my end..

I used to think people understood when i gushed on inspiration and ideas in a heated moment that this is as natural to me as breathing.. i dont think about whether or not i should.. i just do… ideas… they are always floating around me – inside me- active when I am awake and even when I am sleeping.. ideas, concepts, inventions, businesses, and designs…  a constant parade of thought bubbles… i couldnt stop them if i had a  cork…

I suppose most people keep these thoughts on the DL unless they intend to be about them right away… or perhaps they simply only have a limited amount of ideas about what they can do or will do or might do in life…  i rarely see people who hold back making more progress than those who gush.. but i do notice that people who gush can become discouraged by those around them who dampen the concepts because they are not immediately possible, or even remotely probable…  i dont let it get to me.. most of the time.

I do what i do and am the way i am because i am in a constant state of inspiration and sometimes vision… it would be better sometimes to have rest from it, but i dont have that choice… i have a day job, so my other creative projects fumble and bounce along on the waves of my minds wake.  its very sad, but now i know why artists were always starving.. you simply cannot be a successful, well-paid person with a good but demanding career and also create for pleasure..  i create on a daily basis for profit… and that is okay too..  someday i hope to buy my castle in the south of France.. convert it into livable space.. “Nomalimo!” and fritter away my days creating stories…
One, two, three, four…

Sappy pathetic little me
That was the girl I used to be
You had me on my knees

Id trade you places any day
Id never thought you could be that way
But you looked like me on sunday

Oh you came in with the breeze
On sunday morning
You sure have changed since yesterday
Without any warning
I thought I knew you (whoa)
I thought I knew you (whoa)
I thought I knew you well… so well

Youre trying my shoes on for a change
They look so good but fit so strange
Out of fashion, so I cant complain

Oh you came in with the breeze
On sunday morning
You sure have changed since yesterday
Without any warning
I thought I knew you (whoa)
I thought I knew you (whoa)
I thought I knew you well… so well

I know who I am, but who are you?
Youre not looking like you used to
Youre on the other side of the mirror
So nothings looking quite as clear
Thank you for turning on the lights
Thank you, now youre the parasite
I didnt think you had it in you
And now youre looking like I used to!

You came in with the breeze
On sunday morning
You sure have changed since yesterday
Without any warning
And you want me badly
cause you cannot have me
I thought I knew you (whoa)
But Ive got a new view (whoa)
I thought I knew you so well… oh well

Ooh on sunday morning
Without a warning
Sunday morning
I thought I knew you
Sunday morning
Ooh you want me badly
Cannot have me
Sunday morning
Sunday morning
Sunday morning